Zawahri Safari

Ayman al-Zawahri was "tagged" as the new leader of Al Qaeda.  By whom?  Was there a convention?  If yes, why didn't the USA drop a few megatons on it?  Was there an online ballot?  If so can Carnivore or Raptor or Rex tracked down everyone who voted?

Does the former Al Qaeda #2 have sinister plans for the good ol US of A.  Does #2 usually stand for stinky diaper stuffing?  States : guard your borders.  Cities : lock down those bridges.  If our hell-bent-Islamic-brethren are serious about getting to us, they will pre-empt Idol and SYTHYCD this summer.  They will corner the beer and pretzel market.  Watchout Costco and Walmart shoppers, you are a target.

Note to Ayman: Lay low, there is a huge freaking target on your forehead, not unlike Mr. Manson. 

Naughty Pool?

Maybe it's time to start a Naughty Pool.  Very simple.  We toss a bunch of public-figure names in a hat.  The person who tosses in the name of the first one who gets caught being naughty wins the pool.  Who's in?  You don't have to guess what they get caught doing, just a name.

Here are some likely candidates:

Linda McMahon
Johnny Depp
Glenn Beck
Michael Duke
Li Ka-shing

You are of course welcome to imagine what kinds of funny trouble these folks might get caught doing.

Enjoy!

A Match Made in, uh, New Haven?

Palin and Trump? The woman who knows nothing with the guy who knows everything?  Exactly who we need with a finger on the trigger and a hand in the till.  If you think Obama has wasted billions, vote for this pair and wave goodbye to trillions.  If you think foreign relations are messed up now, wait until this pair tries to buy Canada from from the Dr. Pepper/Seven Up company.

The only thing to really squabble about at this point is who gets to use Air Force One on the weekends.